Writer's Block

This week I have writer's block... which is weird and technically shouldn't apply to a blog because it's basically just writing about my life and my nonsense. Regardless, I can't think of anything funny or important to say.

Our "road trip" was shockingly awesome... and we even got lost on the way to the resort and basically went three hours out of our way. Dan and I complained more that Jane. She was all "ba, ba, ba" when she saw a tour bus and "caw, caw, caw" when she saw a car... and Dan and I were all "my a** hurts", "this is effin' brutal", "oh my G** are we there yet?". tee hee hee. Jane was even an angel during the wedding, at one point during the reception, I was having a conversation for well over a half an hour while she played quietly with her food - making a complete mess but who cares about that, I got to have an adult conversation! On the way home, Jane slept the entire 3 hour drive. She hasn't had a three hour nap in 8 months! (Side note: yes, it took us 7 hours to get there on the way).

I've been working my way through my Christmas shopping - if you've not been following since last year then you don't realize that I'm a Christmas-a-holic and I usually have my shopping done and gifts wrapped by early November. :) This year Christmas is more fun than ever as Jane's personality is becoming pretty clear and it's easier to find gifts I think she will enjoy. I'm trying to stick to the "classics" or updated versions of classic toys - instruments, puzzles, pretend play stuff, etc.

Ok, if you want the God's honest truth - I'm sure I could find more nonsense to talk about but Dan just turned Glee on and YAY the new blond guy is back and I really like him.

Oh, on a side note, I had a dream about "Riggins" last night... Friday Night Lights. Taylor Kitsch. Thank you very much Mr. Sandman. :)

Random Nonsense

It's amazing to see their little personalities bloom... obviously you have an influence on who they will become but some things are innate. I mean, I didn't teach my child to be such a character...

Tonight in the bathtub (we still do bath time together in the tub), I was having the time of my life. The fun of having kids is getting to be a kid again yourself... I forgot how much fun splashing and screaming at the top of your lungs could be! :p

We're going on a "road trip" this weekend. Four hours in the car with a 16 month old. Should be interesting. Will more likely be a six hour trip as I suspect we'll have to pull over a few times to let the monkey run and stretch her legs - sounds like I'm talking about a thoroughbred. :p I've picked up a few new books as Jane loves "reading" (i.e. pointing at all the pictures and flipping the pages so quickly I can't read the words) so that may work for like 30 minutes. I'm also hitting the grocery store for all the essential  nutrition-out-the-window because I need things that keep my child occupied snacks - includes things like baked cheetos, marshmallows, etc. Obviously, these "cards" are only put on the table during desperate situations like when I'm tired and need a break. tee hee hee.

Hotels are such a pain in the behind when you have a toddler... mainly due to the eating situation. No fridges in a lot of hotel rooms nowadays, so where do you put your milk? And, of course, no microwaves! How long does it truly take to heat up a bottle with hot water? I have no idea cause I've never done it. :p Thankfully, we've rented a cottage that has a little eating area with fridge and microwave... I'm totally not a cottage type of girl. Cottages = camping to me. Tents = hmmmm, doesn't matter cause it ain't happening. However, the benefits of the cottage far out weigh the "risks" (beds that don't have duvets and have those nasty, floral, bacteria-infested quilt covers - YUCK) when travelling with a toddler - the kitchen, the fridge, the microwave, the separate bedrooms - so we don't have to watch tv in the dark, with no volume from 7pm onward, etc.

Ok, I've done enough blabbering nonsense for now - it's 8:40pm and it's time for me to go upstairs under the guise of reading my parenting book only to fall asleep 10 minutes in. Yes, I am THAT cool. Deal. You should all aspire to achieve my level of coolness. :p

Wow, this is the most random post ever. ha ha ha. I started off just planning on sharing that picture with y'all then I thought, well they don't care about just looking at pictures of Jane all day (you're crazy for that by the way :p) so I started writing about the weekend and then I ended up complaining about hotels. The woman's brain is fascinating - so many things going on all at the same time. We are truly spectacular creatures... :p Although, some nights when I'm lying awake thinking about a bazillion things all at once, I crave the simpler mind of our male counterparts. I'm pretty sure, in 7 years together, Dan's never been up "thinking about things" during the night. The thought is hilarious. And here I go again with another random topic...

Night.

Why I can't make mom friends

This is priceless... I have to admit, as much as I'm the chick on the right, I've definitely had moments where I tried to be "Mrs. Perfect" on the left.... Dan would call these my "Monica moments".

This is so true however as far as the back-n-forth some Moms try to get you into - the competition. Totally wish the video wasn't so robotic because I think it would be even more hilarious if it were done with real people, real expressions and voices. I can just see my girlfriend Kristie in the roll of "chick on the right"... although I'm pretty sure she would have strangled Mrs. Perfect as would I.

Thanks to Lena over at Listen to Lena for passing this one along. Check out her blog right now for a chance to win a crazy expensive Britax stroller!

Enjoy.

Know These Sites?

Thanks to Facebook and some good friends, some fabulous, $$ saving websites have been sent my way and I am officially addicted!

I'm sure there are bazillions more, so feel free to share (please! just don't tell my hubby :p).

The deal with these sites seems to be either one daily deal (posted the same time everyday with limited stock) or multiple daily deals (again, with limited stock)... so basically what I'm saying is, if you want to save $$, check the sites regularly. We're talking dedication people.

Most of these sites offer big discounts - 50%+ - off brandnames... things I look out for are shoes for Jane or unique toys. Now that she's walking, I like to buy her good, comfortable, made for walking, infant shoes... and just like most things, paying more for them makes me feel like they are better shoes and are best for her - so they end up costing me a fortune! All of these sites have baby items and have had Robeez, Pediped and so on for half price! YIPEE!

They also have great stuff for house and home, and also important, YOU! :)

Here's a few:
Totsy - Multiple deals daily - mostly kids/Mom related
Baby Half Off - one daily deal, kids related
Hautelook - multiple fabulous daily deals - kids, house, men, women, shoes, bags - a dream really!
BabySteals and KidSteals - my favourite is babysteals, they have the best stuff - and are now doing two daily steals (9am and 9pm MST) - you have to be quick, quick, quick.
Mother of a Daily Deal - I'm pretty sure they don't actually have "daily deals" but sometimes the deal is good - but the stock seems to be low, so whenever they offer the deal, if you can find out, hop on it cause the stock disappears QUICK.

The other thing I've learned is that signing up for "newsletters" and so on is worth the few extra emails you get in your inbox. I always used to avoid providing my emails to retailers but now, at my fav stores, I'm all over it. I haven't paid full price at Old Navy, Gap, etc. in a while. Also, you get alerts on the sales asap so you can make your way to the store before all the sizes are gone.

Signing up for services like RedFlagDeal's weekly newsletter is also awesome - gives you the best deals of the week. This is where I often find out about 50% off days at Gap and so on. Did you know that Old Navy and Gap (et. al.) are now offering online shopping in Canada - WHOPEE! A few weeks ago, they were having 30% off all baby stuff PLUS on LouLou I found a code for an extra 15% off all Gap, ON, etc. stuff.

Have some more deals-n-steals sites you want to share - or likely not with how quickly stock runs out :p - please do!

Terrible Twos?

Is it at all possible that my 16 month old is going through the "terrible twos"?

There are things I will take responsibility for - like the fact that she won't go to sleep without a nummy - that's my fault, yes - but the drama, the rebellion, the defiance, where did this come from? Is it my fault?

Some days are fabulous. And, honestly, I thought Jane was getting "better" - i.e. she seems to respond to "No" more now vs. laughing at you. But some days I feel like I am disciplining (i.e. yelling at her and taking things away from her and making her screech) for hours at a time!

For instance, tonight, we were drawing on the white board together... and, of course, she started to try and draw on the entertainment unit. So, I started with the "no's" and that worked. But, then she started trying to put the marker in her mouth. By the third time, I took the marker away from her. She cried bloody murder. And, it's things, on and off, like this for hours on end! Another example - again, tonight - we were reading books and we had already read this book five times, backwards and frontwards and upside down, so I put that book down to grab another one. Well, didn't I basically get whacked in the face with the book as Miss Drama screamed at me, pushing the book in my face, demanding we read that book again. So, I said a firm "no", lifted her off me, and walked away. To me, this seems like the common sense approach to not spoiling her - she misbehaves and I do not give her what she wants, letting her know that the way she has behaved will not have good consequences, non? HELP!!

What the heck do I do? I hate that some days the few hours I get to spend with her in the evenings are bouts of screeching because she acts defiantly and I won't give her her way in between periods of fun. Seriously, what the heck do I do? Or am I doing the right things?

Am I doing something wrong? Sometimes I feel like I'm the worst Mom ever! I worry that I'm so worried about "spoiling her" that I'm over-disciplining her... as much as I don't want a spoiled brat, I hate that she's crying all the time - well, not all the time, but you know what I mean - tonight we had two-three breakdowns! Am I responding to the breakdowns properly? Honestly, I have no idea how to respond to them! I usually just try to distract her away from what's making her screech and that works. But should I just ignore her? Obviously I shouldn't comfort her, right? I don't know! AHHHHH!! This is serious rocket science. Being a parent is HARD, HARD, HARD. Having to worry about all the consequences of your actions - knowing that they will affect the little person you are helping develop is STRESSFUL!

I'm reading a book right now. It's been awhile since I resorted to reading a book by the "experts" but this book is from the same series I relied on during pregnancy, babyhood and now the toddler period - The Mother of All... series. And, it says all the things I am describing above (about the drama, defiance, independance, etc.) are "normal". Yeah, well they sure don't feel normal when I'm getting notes from daycare saying my daughter needs to work on her "listening ears". The over-protective Mom in me wants to rationalize it and say that Jane is just advanced and going through the terrible twos early. But, I'm really just worried that Dan and I aren't being effective in disciplining Jane or that we're not responding properly when she throws these tantrums. I haven't gotten far enough into the book to read what you should and should not do or suggested strategies for discipline. Maybe I'm doing the right things? AHHH! Maybe I should read further.

Any suggestions? Has anyone been through this or am I all on my own here?

Smart Shopping Ladies

I"ve written about this before... and saved TONS - insane amounts of money by buying Jane's clothes for the next year at the end of this years season - does that makes sense? In other words, I buy summer clothes for next year at the end of summer this year.

It's not rocket science. I usually just guess sizing and, so far, it's worked out perfectly - for example, right now Jane is wearing either 18-24mth or size 2 pants because she's tall. But, otherwise, they are quite big on her cause she's also slim. So, I'm buying size 3 bottoms for her. They may be a little big, but, chances are, they'll be perfecto!

Here's what you need to know NOW - Old Navy is giving an additional 50% off their clearance items right now!!! Get out there now ladies! The key - don't just look in your kids size area because items are all mixed in together so it's worth searching a few racks to find some goodies. FYI, there was little to no boys stuff where I'm at, so may not be worth it if you're blessed with a little man (sorry).
Here's what I got:
5 Pairs of shorts
10 Pairs of capris/leggings
10 T-shirts/Tank tops
3 Dresses
So, 28 items and basically Jane's entire summer wardrobe next year.

And here's the even better news - I paid $89 in total, including tax. Which means that I paid less than $3 per item pre-tax! In truth, certain items were only 98 cents but I averaged it all up to make it easy!!!
Wanna know how much I saved?  $416. That's how much it would have cost for all my items at regular price. I love sales. Sales make me so happy. I love to save money. Now, my hubby would say - "why are you wasting money on summer clothes right now" - but men aren't forward thinkers, they are now thinkers. Dan thinks
do we really need to spend $100 now on clothes for next year. He doesn't think, spending $100 now will save us over $400 next year. Thank God for me! :p ha ha ha. I can rationalize murder.

Get your behind down to Old Navy quick and do some smart shopping! Although I sound like an Old Navy advertisement, I am obviously not paid by Old Navy for marketing. However, if Old Navy would like to pay me, I am 4000% open to that :p ha ha ha.

Here's the monkey in something that wasn't on sale but was so cute I'm going to share anyways!

Book-Free Room

Judge all you want but I created a "book-free" playroom in my basement. We, of course, we spend most of our time in the playroom upstairs which is packed full of books. But, sometimes, we just need a break.

So, last week - on Sunday - I wanted to watch football. I know, worst Mom in the world right? So, I brought some toys downstairs - including bringing the outdoor slide inside for the winter (I'm a genius, yes). Voila! I set up a chair and ottoman for myself and it was awesome. You know when you bring your kid to someone else's house who has kids and they are occupied for hours because of the new environment and new toys. This is what my basement is like now.

Jane loves to read, which, of course, I love. I love reading to her. And I love it when she comes to me, snuggles on my chest and brings a books with her - every two-three minutes. But, every now and then, I need to go to a place where she can play by herself - which I'm told is good for development and makes me feel less guilty - and I can relax, write on the blog, check facebook, or 30 mins of football, uninterrupted! :p So, we have a book-free zone. Really not so much "book-free" but if you want the PC term - an "independent play area". Whateves - I'm a good enough Mom to not feel guilty calling it what it is - a break room. She loves it and so do I. Highly recommended if you have the space.

The New Look

Thought with my sort of hiatus combined with my sort of "come back", that it was time for a new look. Plus, I'm feeling like we're all a little more grown up now and, so, the blog's design should follow. Mostly, I was probably just bored after Jane went to bed last night and took it out on the blog.

Regardless, you're in the right place.

The Guessing Game

There's nothing worse than when your babe is sick. And worse, when you know their not only sick but also in pain. You've given them the tylenol or the advil and, yet, you're still rocking, and shhhh-ing a crying, upset baby. Or, like me, giving up on the idea of a good night's sleep and settling into the guest room with Jane sleeping on my chest while I lie, uncomfortable and hot as h-e-double hockey sticks (that's h-e-l-l for those of you suffering from major MB)... but she sleeps and, eventually, sweaty and aching, I pass out as well.

No idea what was going on last night. As I said last week, Jane's just getting over hand, foot and mouth disease which was awesome fun. But after two nights of, literally, no sleep - and I mean no sleep, I don't mean that whole "she was up all night" like we used to say when they were young and woke up every 2-3 hours, she was literally awake all night, up every 10-15 minutes. ROCKIN. She started sleeping, no more fever, little rash disappearing, etc. Then, yesterday. Touch her skin. Fever. Come about 8-9 month, thermometers are no longer needed, you feel their skin, their burning hands, and you know - fever. Wicked. So begins the guessing game.

Even the doctors play this game. Last week when I brought Jane to the docs, as usual, I got the "virus" talk...  mysterious rash, fever, boogers = virus apparently. "Just a respiratory virus Jen, continue with saline spray, advil/tylenol as needed, humidifier, etc.". Everytime I go there, it's some mysterious virus that has no treatment except saline spray, humidifier and several nights without sleep... so basically no treatment. It was MY FABULOUS DAYCARE GIRLS who accurately diagnosed Jane with hand, foot and mouth... they've seen it all.

But usually, I play the guessing game alone... to avoid the "virus talk" from my doc. Is it just me or do you also feel judged every time you bring your little one to the doc. If it's something serious, I feel judged because I let it go two days without coming in for an appt. AND WORSE, if I DARE go to a walk-in clinic because my doc was booked up for too long for me to leave it un-assessed. If it's a "virus", I feel judged because I brought her in AGAIN for something that has no treatment and is "obviously" a virus! :p *My doc is great, I'm not critisizing him, I think most of it is things I make up in my head because I'm a woman and I over analyze things*

So, yesterday, I played the guessing game, and - as usual - my go-to culprit was teething. Teething sucks. Jane's "fangs" are coming in. I couldn't remember that they were called canines and called them fangs and my bro-in-law told me I was too into the vampires crap! :p ha ha ha. I guess in the long run, it's great that Jane's teeth seem to come in in twos. But combining fever and pain = crappy sleep and that stinks for everybody. AND, it always seems that Jane's teething is always in line with her being sick. I'm curious if teething lowers you immune system protection? I don't know how - maybe because your body is working to bring the teeth in so doesn't have the energy to fight bugs? That's my theory and I know it's wrong and I don't care. :p

The guessing game stinks - because it can work out well - like in the case where you guess it's "just a virus", avoid the judgmental doctors trip, and proceed with the useless "treatments" - or it can work out crappily (made that word up) and you can end up in a state of guilt because you let your babe go on two or three days with laryngitis without constant pain reliever... like I did in June. :p

Here's my question for you - what the heck do you dress your babe in when he/she has a fever for bed? My doc said, after two nights of me doing the opposite, that you should leave them in whatever they usually sleep in. My thought was, with burning skin and a high fever, wouldn't they be hot? I can't remember how I feel when I have a fever...??? 

Craziness Update

Thought about "you" (by you, I mean you guys - my other Mommas) today when I did something totally stupid and wanted to share... twice today I did stupid mommy brain things that made me feel so cool! :p One - I pulled into a parking spot. Got my change out to put in the meter. Walked up to the meter... for the spot that was next to the spot my car was parked in. Awesome. Two - Pulled into a different parking spot. Put money in the meter. There was already 108 minutes on the meter to begin with and I added money. Awesome.

In all fairness, it's because I'm exhausted. Jane's got hand, foot and mouth disease. Another awesome. It's a virus with fever, rash, sore throat, sores on hands, feet and mouth, and a bazillion other things that have resulted in (1) my child screeching randomly throughout the day (2) no sleep, literally, for either of us - no naps, no sleep, nothing - for two days and (3) a cold for momma. So, like I said, in my defense, I'm running on empty. Thankfully I am able to put on a good front for work and only pull out the MB moments when I'm outside of offices - as far as I know :p

Other updates - a few weeks back, I wanted to ask you about what the heck you do with a child who thinks "no" is funny and is a game? However, the last week or so, Jane seems to have come around, a little (knocking on wood), with the whole discipline situation... a little. She still tests us - purposely doing something she knows will result in a "no" to see if it works. I think she thinks it's a game. Like she'll climb up on the couch, stand up (oh me nerves) and jump (Dear Lord help me) and when I come stomping in to grab her, saying "Jane, NO!" she starts cracking up. When I take her in the other room to "no and distract" as my mom says, she immediately runs back to the couch and starts climbing up. So, people say "why don't you try not responding to her"... and I have tried that. However, when your 15 month old is standing on the edge of the couch, bouncing, not responding might not be the best action, disciplinary or not. :p "Yes, Doctor, just like I said, she broke her arm because I was trying to teach her 'no' by letting her do the wrong thing and not responding"... hello, child services.

Ok, well, perhaps just because I said I wasn't going to write anymore that lately I've started to feel the desire to write again... ha ha ha, a woman always wants what she can't have.

I may be around a little... who knows! :p No commitment though! tee hee hee

Here's a few update pics of my little monkey:

So cute, So true...

There are a few I can really relate to... Thanks Lindsay.

No Desire...

I could come up with a bazillion excuses for why I haven't been blogging lately... and I've probably got some good ones. But, fact is, I just don't have the desire. A year ago, I couldn't get enough. I would pre-write posts for weeks in advance because I just didn't have the time to keep up with all the writing I wanted to do. Today. Zip. I got nothing. I can't think of anything to inspire me (I don't mean I don't have inspiration, I guess motivation is the word not inspiration). I could absolutely write about squat but it would suck because I am not into it.

This struggle kind of makes me feel like when you're trying to lose weight... most of us go on for week talking about how we need to lose weight and need to exercise, but until we're completely motivated, it's just making us feel guilty and crappier because we know we need to lose weight and we're doing nothing. I know I need to just fess up and say "I'm probably not going to be blogging regularly anymore" but it makes me feel guilty!

But, truth is, if it ain't clear, I'm probably not going to be blogging regularly anymore. This blog has been awesome. I have met some fabulous friends from all over the world and, most importantly, survived the first year as a new Mom with my sanity. I thank everyone for following regularly and being so supportive and, even, to those who have been critical (although I thank you less :p ha ha ha, just kiddin).

I may still "pop in" every once in awhile to give an update on how everyone is doing. Or to ask for advice when I'm completely lost.

Good luck to all of you. Obviously, the blog will remain online and active as I know there are a few of you still using it as a resource to keep your own sanity! :)

Lots of love, xoxoxo
Jen
a.k.a. Mommy Brain

PS - Mommy brain still affects me every now and then. Got to the line up at the grocery store today without my wallet. Awesome.

My Life Update

Alright Y'all - I owe you some serious nonsense. Life has been insanity lately - between work, being sick, traveling and, oh yeah, being a MOM, blogging has unfortunately taken a back burner. So, here's the last month or so in review...

What I'm wearing
Size 4 or 6! Believe it or not, and you know me, I am definitely NOT bragging, but I weigh less than I did pre-pregnancy now. And there's absolutely no reason for it. I just finished off a bag of sour patch kids and some "mini" chocolates. I think it's just pure busy-ness that's prevented me from gaining weight and allowed me to lose weight. At work, when things are ideal, I'm running my a** off. At home, I'm running my a** off. I still don't exercise. F. I suck at that. I keep thinking I want to take another running room course, and it might just work out in the next month or so.

What I'm watching
Currently... the Bachelor Pad. First time watching - no idea how long it's been on but I was hooked within 30 seconds. Priority numero uno is True Blood though. Dear God can Sookie just get over nasty Bill and get with the were or Eric. Seriously. I realize the two are a couple in real life but I'm over it. Next on my favs list for the summer - an unexpected CANADIAN hit - Rookie Blue. I'll admit, the first few episodes I watched cause nothing else was on... kind of lame, awkward acting, etc. Now. I am insanely obsessed. If you watch - holy MAC - that chemistry between Mcnally and Swarek. PHEW! Insanity. I just wish the entire show was them going back and forth. Other than those, I stick to TMZ which makes me pee my pants daily and that's about it. Looking forward to the return of all my favs in the fall - just hoping they don't can all the shows I got hooked on last year - I hate it when they do that. At least finish the freakin' show off by letting the two people get together in the end - basically every show I get hooked on has the couple who can't be together but secretly want each other storyline.

What I'm worrying about
Everything as usual. This is totally corn-bally but I love Jane so much that it is scary. Obviously, I enjoy every minute with her and I'm truly not the type of person to let worry overtake my life. But, at least daily, my mind wanders to "what if" or I have one of those horrible daydreams I've mentioned a bazillion times and it's just so freakin' stressful! ha ha ha. How do Moms do it? How am I going to let her leave the house on her own, go to school, go somewhere alone, leave for university... does it get easier? Even when I leave Jane with people I trust completely (my sister, daycare, my mom), I envision them leaving a gate open or her getting away from them and getting lost or getting taken or getting hurt. AHHHHH. Am I crazy? Like I said, my mind's not going like this all the time. But it probably is, I'm just not conscious of it. In all honestly, for the same reason I posted that horrible video the other day, I am thankful for the worry because it keeps me on my toes. Obviously there are times when we slip up - we forget to close the gate and find our babes halfway up the stairs (yeah, that was me, I'll admit it), we turn our backs for a second when we shouldn't, etc. But I'd rather be super aware than ignorant... that's just me.

What I'm waiting for
Nothing. I am being 2000% honest when I say that I am enjoying every minute of every day right now! Having kids changes your perspective - yeah, sometimes I still have my moment where I whine about stupid things but mostly, no. I am just happy to have a healthy family, to be happy, to have lots of time to spend with my daughter. That's it. I guess as far as stupid stuff goes - I'm waiting for the Backstreet Boys concert next week - WOOHOO. ha ha ha. Who doesn't want to relive their adolescence for a night?!?! C'mon! Get down! Get down! And move it all around! :p

What I'm dreading.
Having to clean the house tomorrow. Seriously considering hiring a cleaning lady to come in bi-weekly. It's just not worth it anymore. Keeping the house tidy is no biggie. But bathrooms and baseboards? I'd rather exercise and that's saying a lot! My only saving grace is my trusty Clorox wipes. I am loyal to Clorox until the end of days. They were my best friend when Jane was little and cleaning time consisted of the five seconds I was in the kitchen to get myself a glass of water. I am not loyal to much as far as products go - I'm loyal to the cheapest brand, I guess. But I stick with Clorox because I feel indebted to them. ha ha ha. Seriously. Isn't that sad! And because they last forever. I used to see them pre-baby and think, geez, $4 for stupid wipes... expensive. I can get two bottles of concentrated cleaner for that that will last me a year. Now, $4 is nothing. The canister lasts me at least a month and it's worth every extra penny. Sanity is priceless.

What I'm working on
A job change. I know, I just got a new job a few months ago. Well, life works in strange ways. A job came up with a company I had connected with back in the Spring and it is a great opportunity and definitely fits more easily with our lifestyle and  our schedules. My current job was shifts, days/nights/weekends. I didn't think it would be so difficult but it really has been a coordination nightmare. Dan's been in and out of town for sports and work and it's just been a mess. I hate being anything but a great, easy, hard working employee. So, to be a pain in the a** because of scheduling, was hard on me. Regardless, I'm a firm "what's meant to be..." chick. So, I'm excited about this new opportunity.

What I need to do now
Go to bed. It's almost 11pm and I should have been asleep hours ago. Jane's got this new "schedule" (I put it in quotations in hopes that it's more of a phase than a schedule) where she wakes up at 5 or 5:30am. It's awesome. And, by awesome, I mean throw the pillow over your head and ask "WHY GOD WHY???" awesome. I don't know why 6am is so much easier or why that extra 30-60 minutes means the difference between acceptable and excruciating but that's the way it is. Everything gets screwed by that extra 30-60 mins.... I eat breakfast at 6am. I'm starving again at 8am. I'm ready to go back to bed by 9am. It's a mess.

Ok, I have to stop now. As requested, here are some pics from our recent trip. Believe it or not, we have like no photos from the wedding. I'm sure the prof pics will have a few of me walking down the aisle with Jane but by the time we got back to the reception, Jane was asleep and that was that! The pics of Jane and Lucy are pre-rehearsal dinner - matching dresses of course! They were hilarious playing together on the bed. Obviously, the beautiful bride is my bestest friend in the whole world and she was literally the most stunning thing I'd ever seen in my life!

Out of the Office :)

On vacation until Tuesday... Have a great one! :)

Resume Update

I've decided to update my resume - and I'm putting Mom as my most recent position. I'm 100% serious when I say that I don't see how employers don't line up to give new and experienced Moms a job. We can do ANYTHING. My life is a constant juggle that I make work. I'm an organizational genius. I can prioritize like no one's business. Multi-task is my middle name. Delegation is survival. Seriously. I'm considering listing it under the following title: CEO, CFO & President, The Ellenberger House.

You know what? I think, if you were lucky enough to come by another Mom when applying for a job, that would work in your favour.

However, when most of us head back to work - the questions we get are along the lines of "do you think you can handle the hours?", "aren't you going to be exhausted?"... etc. etc. Are you serious? Exhausted? The hours? Working outside the house is a breeze compared to my former full-time Mom position! :p Working an 8 or 9 hour day is nothing compared to working a 24/7 week on 4 hours of broken sleep. Like I said, we can do anything. Even on day when my previous night's sleep has been horrible because of a sick baby, or a teething baby, or just an "off baby, I survive with a smile on my face - why? - because we have to! When our babes were newbies and barely sleeping 3 hours straight at a time, we didn't wake up grouchy, complaining, and unable to perform our roles as Mommas - we woke up smiling, bouncing, playing and happily taken care of business for our sweetie pies. As opposed to others who may arrive at work on lack of sleep and whimper around, head hanging low, rubbing eyes, etc. (we've all seen it), we arrive to work (on no sleep) smiling and working at the same pace as always - efficiently. At least, I can generally say that for myself. The only time lack of sleep gets me down is when it results in being sick... at that point your body is commanding you to slow down.

On that note, gotta run to work! :)

Travel Tips?

Anybody have any good traveling with a 14 month old tips for me? Aside from the obvious - drink on the way up/down and so on...

We're off to my best friend's wedding "back home" this weekend and I can't wait! I've been working on my packing list for almost three weeks now and it all seems to be coming together. You may think - three weeks? WTH? But that's how it works. If I were to just sit down and pound out a list right now, I'd forget a thousand things. But, if I start a list weeks in advance, as I'm using necessary things, I write them down... prevents me from having to rely on solely on the immediate power of my brain and allows me to rely on the fact that my brain works in spurts over time vs. on demand! :p ha ha ha.

Here are the things running through my head on a regular basis the last month:
Does my room have a fridge? A lot of hotels have done away with bar fridges. Where am I supposed to keep my milk?
Where will Jane sleep? Do I have to bring my pack-n-play? Does the hotel have "cribs"? Do I really want Jane sleeping in a hotel "crib" (no)? When she does sleep - what will we do? We can't turn on the tv/lights/etc... so we just lie there in the dark from 7pm onward?
What about snacks and mealtimes? I don't carry a high-chair around with me. Most restos have them so that's no biggie for bf/lunch/dinner but what about snack times? I'm not hitting up a resto or store everytime it's snack time. Have to hit up the grocery store on arrival and that leads back to the fridge question (thankfully, I've checked and our hotel does have fridges).
What about heating up the bottles? Most hotels don't have microwaves in the rooms!?!? I'll have to pre-heat in hot water!!! AHHHH! That should be "fun".
Jane's not going to fall asleep with us in the room! She's going to hop up, see us, and laugh. Awesome. Will have to make some fort around her pack-n-play so she can't see us... that should be interesting.
Schedule is thrown out the window I guess. Hoping that doesn't screw up my night's sleeps and the rest of my life when I get home! ha ha ha. On the positive side, it's really the girls at daycare who will have to deal with the consequences - sorry girls! :)
How do you keep a 14 month old occupied during a wedding ceremony?
I should to re-confirm my rental car and hotel and third time. Just to be sure. Imagine if I arrived and there was no car for me. Awesome.
We aren't bringing many toys... is Jane going to go insane? Hmmm, we'll probably be pretty busy running around and Lucy will be around, that's the best toy ever right there! :p
Do I even bother bringing my camera? I love taking pictures but seeing as Dan's not arriving until the weekend, managing Jane and a camera seems like exercise. Nah. Mom will probably have hers and that'll do.
HAH - haven't even mentioned the most exciting part of it all - 1.5 hours on a plane with Jane stuck in a seat with me. Dear Person sitting next to us... you should have paid more and gotten first class. Love, Me. Jane's pretty laid back but, then again, she's not recently be stuck in the same place for almost two hours. Definitely should be an interesting adventure. On the plus, I'm flying Porter and apparently they have free booze. So worst case, Mommy gets tanked and thinks it's funny that Jane is running up and down the aisle yelling at everyone as she passes... :p Here's a thought for you - when traveling alone, what do you do with your child when you have to get into your seat and put your bag under the seat in front of you? Huh. Most people don't think about that until you're on the plane faced with the delima. F. That stupid word again. Seriously? Dilemma. YAY. Only took two tries. Not such a big deal when babes are sturdy enough to sit themselves or stand but the first time I traveled with Jane she was 8 weeks... thankfully, I had my Dad to help me out! On that note. How do you get out your ID and boarding passes and then, WORSE, get them back in your wallet securely with a baby in your arms? Hmmm... Nevermind, I'll have the umbrella stroller. Phew. :p
Oh Man. The airplane is nothing compared to maneuvering security lines and everything. Crap. Didn't even think about that. And people are such dicks too. If I saw a Mom traveling with a baby by herself, I'd help her out or let her skip ahead of the line or something! Sometimes people surprise me though. We'll see. East coasters tend to be kind people - TEND being the key word there. Even "angels" can be a**holes on the wrong day.

K, have to go. I know I'm the worst blogger in the world as far as frequency these days. If you're not back to work yet... welcome to bliss and hell. Bliss in that it's awesome to get back a little of your previous self. Hell in that you want to spend every second you have at home with your sweetie pie and then, when they hit the sheets, you're exhausted!

PLEASE WATCH

Ladies, ladies, ladies... please watch this video and show it to your hubbies. I know we have all heard this before - don't throw water on a pan that's caught fire, but I know that would have still been my first instinct  and I DEFINITELY wouldn't expect it to make things so much worse... scary as heck!

Shoes Please

I'm serious - I have been looking for white dress shoes for Jane for like a month and a half now! I can't find them anywhere. We have a wedding to be in in a week - no shoes. Although it is a summer wedding, me thinks that barefoot is not church-appropriate, non? :p

I can find tons of black, patent leather shoes for infants but NO WHITE!!! What the heck?!?! What little girl wears a black dress and, therefore, would require black dress shoes? Perhaps, this is why I can't find any white ones. Here's dilema (how the heck do you spell delema? delimna? dilema? dilemma? ahhh there it is - no red line under that one). Mommy brain still in full swing as you can see - although I'm not 100% sure I knew how to spell that pre-baby either! :p Stupid me. Oh, as I was saying (great previous sentence eh? - I almost left it at that without talking about dilemma number two) - delimma number (seriously - I just spelled that wrong again!!! DILEMMA number two is that I don't want to spend $50 on stupid shoes Jane is only going to wear once before she outgrows them! GRRRRRR. Is there a white shoe shortage?

Help. I need options. Quick. My sister needs shoes too or both Jane and "Luce" (Lucy) are going barefoot and beautiful - which, of course, we would think was cute while everyone else would be wondering what kind of mother would send their child out without shoes.

On that note. Only other mother's get that. Sometimes, I hit up the grocery store with Jane and no shoes. Non-moms look at you like your the mother from hell (That mom is so lazy she couldn't even put shoes on her child! HORRIBLE!). Other moms get it. Shoes are a pain in the A** sometimes. First of all, by the time I get to the store, both shoes are off and have likely been thrown at my head while driving. Secondly, if we make it into the store with the shoes we, never fail, end up backtracking through Sobeys looking for the $50 shoe that got dropped on the floor between the meat dept and the frozen food aisle (basically the entirety of the store of course). Thankfully, usually, I end up finding said shoe at customer service as someone was nice enough to see a tiny shoe and think I might need it... thank God for other Moms! Only another Mom would see a baby shoe on the floor and realize what would have happened.

Similar to that "note" is the fact that sometimes, and by sometimes I mean almost daily, I go out in public without realizing that my child's face is full of food. Non-moms look at you with disgust - That mom doesn't even care enough to clean their child! HORRIBLE! Moms get it - not only is my child's face full of food but it's likely that my own face, teeth and hair haven't been cleaned either. This morning, for example, I dropped Dan and Jane off to "work" (obviously Jane was going to daycare). I took her out of the car seat and handed her to Dan, then went to kiss her goodbye and realized breakfast was all over her face. Awesome. So, I did what any self-respecting mother would do and washed her face with my thumb and spit... ha ha ha, special. At least until Dan said "enough hun, she looks fine" and cut me off. I've literally gone to the playground before with an entire container of yogurt on Jane's face without even noticing... and it's only for the fact that it's other Moms there that I don't even bother explaining myself because I know they get it... it's only when I get down there and realize that she's got lunch on her face and no shoes on that I feel the need to explain myself. ha ha ha.

Alrighty, time for TMZ and tea. :)

"Leash" Time

Ok, that title makes this sound crude... but it's not.

Lately, now that Jane is walking as her primary "method of transportation", I've been having these horrible "daydreams" about her getting hit by a car. I know. It's graphic. It's brutal and it ROTS my mind. Obviously, I don't sit around "daydreaming" about this but, it seems, no matter what these days, I'll be lying in bed getting ready to fall asleep and no matter where my mind wanders, somehow, my "day-nightmare" ends up with my precious baby running out onto the road, or running away from me in a parking lot, or.... you get it. My stomach turns.

So, I'm off today to get a kiddie "leash"... I know they aren't leashes and a lot of people don't like that term but I've got a sense of humour, I'm not ashamed of my desire to have my baby within my reach at all times and I don't care what anyone will think when I'm walking through Walmart or down my own street with my sweet baby Jane hooked by my side.

I remember my neighbour had one for her son with a little teddy bear backpack thingy-me-jigger on it and he LOVED it. He used to carry it around with him when he wasn't even hooked into it.

Personally, between the bad drivers, the drivers on cell phones, the (WORSE, and I have no problem saying right now that I don't like you people AT ALL) people who TEXT WHILE DRIVING, and the people who are never paying attention no matter what they are doing, I want to make sure there is never a risk that Jane will dash away from me and into danger. I mean, we were just walking to the mailbox the other day (a five second trip that now takes 45 minutes but is so worth it to see how happy Jane is to be out and independent), and it was like she waited for the exact time the bus was driving by to make a dash for the road... she wasn't even any where near the edge of the sidewalk when I grabbed her but, regardless, my heart stopped!

Obviously, you can't protect them from everything. I mean, Jane's knees are totally skinned from our little jaunts to the mailbox but scratches, cuts, broken bones, colds, flus, etc. I can deal with. Other things, that shall remain nameless, I would obviously like to avoid - DUH - and will do everything I can to do so.

FYI... just looked up the PC term and it's a "child safety harness" not a "leash".

So, I'm off to Walmart this AM to pick up the cutest, tricked-out, backpack, teddy bear leash I can find.

I just realized to add to the list of bad drivers and such, the world is also filled with creepers. How many times have you heard "I turned my back for one second and she was gone"... heart. stopping. Looking forward to my "child safety harness", whatever, my leash, even more now. Actually kind of excited about the peace of mind it will bring me! :)

Here's pictures from last night's supper... apparently Jane's a big fan of lasagna and peekaboo. :p

Celebrity Rant

Dear Tom Cruise,
I'm pretty certain I'm like the only person left in the world who doesn't think you're some crazy alien-loving weirdo... therefore, you should definitely send me some money. Thank you. PS - Wish you were taller or that someone hadn't pointed out to me just how short you are.

Dear Mel Gibson,
Seriously? You used to be so hot. Look up "money can't buy you happiness" in the dictionary and there you are... hmmm, then again, maybe you're happy, you're just psychotic.

Dear Lindsay Lohan,
Holy S***. If you were my daughter, I would have handcuffed you to a rehab bed and left you there... like 10 years ago.

Dear Taylor Lautner and Zac Efron,
How come 17 yr old boys didn't look like you when I was 17?

Dear Angelina Jolie,
I like you but you need to eat a sandwich. Workout plan? Oh, yeah, "chasing around 45 kids" or whatever you have... yeah, sure. Probably nothing to do with the fact that you are likely a vampire or some creepy crap and are still living off Billy Bob Thorton's blood. Eat something, you're not a good role model for you daughters when you weigh less than them!

Dear Justin Beiber,
I wish there were more reasons to dislike you but you're just so darn cute and I can't help but get your songs in my head.... baby, baby, baby ohhhhhhh.

Dear Taylor Swift,
I love that you are such a good role model for the little ladies (and, whateves, I admit that I love your crazy teenage songs). But do something questionable, at least once or you're going to end up like Britney in 5 years - shaving your head, stealing clothes from the homeless and pretending they are acceptable outside-the-house wear. The whole dating John Mayer thing was on the right track... Keep tryin.

Dear TV people,
What gives you the right to take the summers off? Every one else (teachers excluded, they deserve it and don't make a bazillion a year) has to work all year round... suck it up. I'm sick of watching So You Think You Can Dance and HGTV cause nothing else is on.

Dear Justin Timberlake,
When did we forget that you had a curly blond "fro" and sang songs like "Dirty Pop" and "Bye, Bye, Bye" (which I'm not saying I didn't like... 15 years ago!). And people say Tommie Boy is a brain washer... you've even convinced 50 cent you're not a fanny boy. You drive me crazy.

Dear Kim Kardashian,
Give me your body and your hair and, as long as I can keep my daughter and my husband, can I have your rich NFL boyfriends too? Thanks girlfriend!

Dear Jennifer Anniston,
Time to give up on the rom-coms honey. You either need to try to pitch a "Rachel on my own" TV series or just give up. Oh, and don't dare do another movie with douchebag Gerard Butler anymore... yucko.

Dear Bachelor/Bachelorette Casting People,
Enough with the douchebags already... perhaps a new screening process like ASKING people if they have girlfriends first?!?! OR, maybe (this is revolutionary I know) NOT casting chicks that are "aspiring actors/models". Point two - maybe, instead of sending people off to Hawaii, all expenses paid with helicopter ride after yacht ride, you could send people to Moncton, NB and see how long the romance lasts then... just an idea.

Dear Will Smith,
Time for another movie. Oh, and, whenever you're ready to propose, I'm ready. Cept that little Karate Kid of yours needs a lesson in being humble... 11 year olds shouldn't be acting like "playas" on the Today Show.

Dear Helen Fielding,
Time for a new Bridget Jones - either a new character or a new story - Bridget Jones has a baby or something. Not only because it's funny but because Renee Scally-wagger is probably dying to have something to eat by now.

Dear Sookie Stackhouse (From True Blood for those of you who have no idea what I'm talking about),
Time to give Eric some loving. Bill's WAY over. Alcide will do for next season. Your welcome for the story idea.

The end. For now. :)

Car Seat Conflict

I read a few months ago that the longer a babe stays rear-facing in the car seat, the better. Regardless, I've been so excited about putting Jane forward facing. She's always been a great traveler but I thought she'd enjoy it more if she was facing "the world" and able to see Mommy and Daddy and so on.

So, my mom was in town this weekend and we all wanted to go shopping. We thought - let's take one car (SUV). Despite my hesitation to take out my car seat (because it's in my car so sturdily and perfectly). Anyways, I do the gymnastics act that is "the removal of the car seat" and my sis and I started putting the seats in the SUV. HAH. Suckers. It didn't work. Don't know why (it was my mom's rental) but it was missing a latch... awesome. So, 20 mins later and about 500 calories, we put our car seats back in our own cars. Since mine was out, I thought now would be the perfect time to flip it around. So, I did. Sturdy as ever, I was quite proud.

Put Jane in and immediately noticed she's lying back a little more than she probably should. Gymnastics act number two. Car seat fixed (needed to move the base closer to the back of the seat) and she looks comfy. Driving along I noticed a few things - Jane loved forward facing (but really no different than rear-facing because she used to watch me in the mirror), and I hated it. As opposed to when she was rear-facing and I could see her in the mirror, now I had to turn around to see her - not the safest thing to do while driving. No fun at all.

After she hit the sack last night, I started thinking about the article I had read a few months back - about being safer to have them rear-facing as long as the weight limit allows (ours it 35 lbs). I know most of my gf's with babes over 12 months moved them to forward facing (I think the recommendations is over 12 months and over 20 lbs or something). Regardless, the worrier in me had to google it. And I found tons. This was the article I read though... click here. There were also a lot more articles from credible sources stating that it's five times safer to have baby facing the rear as, in the event of a crash, the force is spread all along baby's entire back, shoulders, neck and head vs., when forward facing, mostly on the neck and head.

Gymnastics act number three. This morning I was out switching around my car seat again to rear-facing. Obviously, I totally understand other moms following the usual 1+ yr, 20lbs guideline. But, seeing as Jane is content either way, I'm going to stick with this way for us. Being a mom turns you into a complete nut when it comes to worrying... since Jane was born my thought has always been "what if something DID happen and I hadn't done what was 'recommended'" - I would never forgive myself. Most of the time when things happen, everything is out of your control and no one is to blame, nothing to blame. But, I know myself, and knowing that something is safer (whether it be sleeping on their backs or rear-facing car seats), if something happened and I had ignored recommendations, I would end up in the mental hospital.

I'm happier about the third switch too because now I can see my little bug easily by just glancing in the rear-view mirror. :)

Okee dokes. Off to work.

PS - Pics from our trip to the lake this weekend - SO beautiful. We've been having the most amazing summer (which of course means everyone's complaining of the heat)! Jane hated the lake on the first go because the water was too cool for her but, maybe it was warmer on Saturday, because she was in love!!! Cracking up all over the place!

If I Had a Million Dollars...

Not that I wouldn't be over the moon about a million bucks but it doesn't pack the same punch as it used to back in the 80's/90's does it? These days, a million bucks would be FAB but, unless you've got some sort of guaranteed get-rich investment opp, you're probably still going to have to work.

So, by "if I had a million dollars" I really mean, if I was loaded rich and didn't have to worry about money... :)

First on my list - no more work. Not because I don't like working or don't like my job but because I'd want to use some of my (oops, I mean "our" :p) money to start my own thing... no idea what it would be but those details are not important right now! :) Obviously getting Dan to give his "two weeks" is included with this.

Numba two - house hunting. Time for Jane to get a backyard.

Number three - car shopping, whoppeee! BMW X6 here I come!!

Number four - house keeper. DUH. I want to spend every free minute I have with my Jane. NOT cleaning and cooking! If we have any extra income even now I'm considering using it for Molly Maids every couple weeks. The tidying is no big deal - we keep on top of it. It's the freakin' cleaning - the bathrooms, the floorboards, etc. that takes so much stupid time! And, I used to love cooking, until I had to get home from work and do it... now, I would be content living off KD and Lean Cuisine (yuck) - that's a bit of a lie.

Number five - VACATION! Dan, Jane, Jen and close family and friends - HAWAII, two weeks (because I assume my family and friends will still have to work - unless I've won so much money that they can all retire as well).

Number six - Masseuse. Live-in. Daily for as long as I want/need. AHHHHHHHH.

Number seven - Hairstylist. I hate doing my hair. It's curly but I like it straight but I hate straightening it and, even worse, I hate straightening it when it's hot, rainy, humid, basically anything but freezing cold sunny day outside because it's a waste of time. If someone else did it it would be awesome because I love it when people play with my hair - almost as good as a massage for me.

Obviously I would donate a ton to charities.

Problem with the above plan... I don't buy lotto. The only time I buy lotto is when it's like $40M or more which just makes me laugh every time I do it. Apparently, anything under $30-$40M isn't enough for me?!?!? WTH! ha ha ha. A lot of people do this and it's obviously stupid but I keep doing it anyways. And, as soon as I buy the ticket, I start daydreaming about what I'm going to do with my money when I win.

People say "money can't buy happiness" and I agree. If you're a negative, grouchy, complaining, non-bright side type of person, money ain't gonna help that you suck. But, I do think money can buy you freedom... freedom to make your own decisions without regard for money (which is often one of the biggest limiting factors when making a lot of decisions).

With that said, do I consider myself to be the luckiest person in the world already - heck yeah! My life is great. Are there some things I would love to have or do? Heck yeah... but I don't sit around being grouchy about it. Life is awesome. There's always someone who has it MUCH worse. Remember that when you're whining about something stupid. I know it's hard and I whine all the time but I try to be appreciative for what I have vs. envious of what I don't have.

K, battery dying. Hoping to write more this week than I did last. Hmmm... maybe if I was rich I could get someone to write for me! ha ha ha :p Kind of defeats the purpose eh?

Genius Idea

So, I'm making Jane's breakfast this morning and she just loves berries - of any kinds, actually fruit of any kind which is great. The strawberries that I bought are "wild" (not like party wild, like natural wild :p tee hee hee) so they are smaller than the unnaturally impossibly HUGE strawberries that are usually shipped in from the southern states. Now, my sweet baby, is a stuffer. She stuffs huge amounts of food into her mouth. So, when I saw the grape sized strawberries all I was thinking was, yeah, I can see what's going to happen here and with this stuffing issue, she's going to take the full strawberry, stuff it in her mouth and then deal with the consequences - I'm always worried she's going to choke on something.

Light. bulb. moment. GENIUS.

Oh my goodness, I could cut them up! Seriously. That was my genius moment. I looked at the strawberries for about a minute before I realize my obvious solution.

I may not have mommy brain moments as much anymore but the brain power is definitely not in full swing yet.

Coordination Nightmare

This was my morning...

1:30am - Jane wakes up, won't go back to sleep. Worked 12-8pm last night so missed her anyways and didn't mind bringing her into bed with me! :) Had fabulous dream about Chris Noth (Mr. Big, SATC) that made me very happy.
7:00am - Woke up. Jane still sleeping. Stuck in bed as wouldn't leave her there for a second in fear of her attempting to get off the bed on her own (i.e. falling off).
7:20am - Jane wakes up. BOING. That's how Jane wakes up. No tossing and turning, no whining, no slow somber wake up. She BOINGS up, opens her eyes and laughs.
7:21am - Crap. Realize it's 7:21am and I have to work at 9am. Crap. Time to put 'er into gear.
7:30am - Wake up Dan so he can keep Janers occupied while I attempt to make myself presentable. It's about this time that I remember that Dan's taking Jane to a wedding this afternoon by himself and that I have to do a lot of "prep work" before I leave for work. Awesome.
7:32am - Downstairs, getting breakfast for Jane and cleaning up as I go. Oh yeah, I should probably eat myself. Crap, I have to pick out some wedding-friendly toys (e.g. books as they are the only non-noise-making toys in my house) and throw some snacks in a bag that will hopefully keep Jane occupied for a wedding ceremony... should I mention to Dan that this is very, very, very unlikely? Should I mention that it's likely that she'll be occupied for about 45 seconds on his lap before she wants to get down and walk and tells everyone that by squealing at the top of her lungs. Nah. He'll figure it out. I did tell him to sit at the back!
7:45am - CRAP. Books, snacks done. Need to put on my "war paint" (a.k.a. makeup) and brush my hair. No time for shower, good thing I thought of that last night. Still in my pj's. Have to pick out Jane's dress for wedding. Crap. Does she have dress shoes that still fit her? Dan makes it downstairs and isn't feeling so hot. Decides he better skip out on the wedding as between the whole "not so hot" thing and the Jane factor, a successful single-Dad wedding adventure is virtually impossible. PHEW as I forgot that I decided to leave the gift wrapping, card signing and direction finding until this morning in my last night laziness.
8:00am - Still in pj's but ready otherwise (although an outfit hasn't been pick out - minimal issue). Dan comes upstairs and says that he is going to go to the wedding because he feels bad. Jane getting cranky. Tell him that she probably wants her "baa-baa" and he heads back downstairs to get it ready.
8:05am - Jane's dress shoes barely fit. Like, it's a good thing she won't be out walking around because it's probably child abuse. Add that to my to do list for tomorrow - size 5 dress shoes for Jane, check! These'll do for today. Dan arrives with bottle and I disappear to go downstairs and wrap the gift. I can hear Jane freaking out from downstairs but I leave it, Dan is a more-than-capable daddy.
8:10am - Dan gives up and comes downstairs. Jane too grouchy, not taking bottle. Mommy gives it a try (which I kind of wanted to anyways because I'd be away from her all day - it's as if she and I planned it that way) and it works for me. Jane down for nap. PHEW.
8:20am - Dan decided to go for nap because he feels like crap. Wrapped the gift and found the info on where the wedding is/what time it is for Dan.
8:30am - Crap. It's 8:30. I gotta get going. Still in my freakin' pj's!
8:40am - Dressed and ready to go. Out the door.
8:41am - Back inside. Upstairs to ask Dan how the heck he plans on getting to the wedding when I'm about to drive away with our one-and-only car?!?! AHHHHH! Jane's asleep, he's in his pj's and I'm already on the verge of being late. We decide that we'll figure it out later. Even though, I know, that Saturday's are supposed to be insane at work and, thus, I'm obviously not allowed to take a break to drive home and be driven back to work and dropped off so my hubby can have the car. We'll figure it out later. Awesome. Genius.
11:00am - Start calling Dan from work. No answer. Call 45 times. No answer. She's got to have woken up by now and things are dead here at work so I can probably sneak away for 10 mins to pop home and pop back so Dan can have the car.
12:00pm - Calling Dan. No answer. WTH!!! Now I worry and then I get angry - I wish he'd answer the freakin' phone.
12:30pm - Dan answers. Jane apparently woke up right after I left. Then he got sick. Then they had a three hour nap snuggled together on the bed. Wedding is out - he feels like crap. Probably has what Jane and I suffered through for the last two weeks.

No one's fault obviously but super glad I ran around headless-chicken style all day for nuthin'! What a mess. Is having a baby the best thing I've ever done, could ever imagine, in my entire life? ABSOLUTELY! Does it sometimes make things that were once simple, challenging? ABSOLUTELY!  Worth it? ABSOLUTELY! Exhausting? ABSOLUTELY!

Have a great weekend!

I Give Up

Jane's got a rash. Started on Sunday on her feet and now it's all over her except her face. It's little red bumps every where - on her hands, bottoms of her feet, everything.

The doc said it is an allergic reaction to the antibiotics - so no more penicillins for Jane. I'm not 100% convinced. She finished the drugs on Saturday (he's aware of all of this) and then had a reaction start on Sunday afternoon? I'm no doc but that doesn't seem to make sense to me? Of course, being the googler that I am, I found some info on rashes following fever - so that's what we thought it was as Jane had that high fever for a few days when she was sick with Strep (which we now thing wasn't strep but was actually a virus - oh, dear lord, do doctors know anything?). But, I'm not 100% convinced on that either. I did some more googling today and saw some pictures of prickly heat rash... and it looks exactly like what Jane has. Now, I'm not saying that there aren't many rashes that look like this but when I looked up allergic rash - it looked more like inflamed blotches vs. tiny red bumps like Jane has.

Adding to my theory is that today was crazy hot and we went for a swim in the lake with cousin Lucy and the rash appeared to get a little worse - with a few red bumps showing up on her face.

So, here's my POA... baking soda cool water baths, keeping her in little to no clothing when it's warm, sleeping her in nothing but pj's (i.e. no sleep sac or blanket) with the fan on and window open, and giving her benadryl before bed. Now, this last one troubles me. The last two nights I have given her the benadryl pre-bed and the last two nights, come 1:30ish she won't go back to bed unless she's sleeping with me. I know benadryl can cause either drowsiness or excitability in infants. So, I was worried it was the benadryl that was keeping her up or waking her up, I guess. But, now, as I'm writing this, I'm remembering that the benadryl wears off after 4-6 hours which wouldn't make sense. It would make more sense that, maybe, she's waking up because she's itchy because the benadryl has worn off. I don't know. Holy MAC, does it ever end? The worry, the theories, the changes, etc. Jane was just sleeping through the night and now this nonsense and she's all shagged up again!!! She was just starting to get back to normal - no runny nose, no cough, no sick - and BAM a freakin' rash!!! WTH!!!

And, of course, in typical Mom style, I've been bringing her in the bed with me because she immediately falls back to sleep vs. crying for an hour in her crib. So now I'm worried that she's only waking up because she wants to sleep with me! Again, the worry never ends! :p I must admit, I don't hate having her sleep with me. Being back to work I miss the hours and hours we used to get together so getting some snuggle time at night is kind of awesome and super special. But I definitely don't sleep as well as I'm constantly worried (again, worry) that she will wake up in the middle of the night and fall off the bed. AHHHHH! My mind is fried. This is why mommy brain exists.

Oh, and to add to my worry, a guy I work with just told me his son has croup and that it's super contagious. Awesome. SO now I'm going to be WORRIED that because I've been within 4 ft of this dude, she's going to get croup too.

I need my own personal, expertly trained, never wrong, physician (that's not to say I don't love my current doc, he's great) who lives in my basement so I can consult them on demand. l

Oh, one more worry. Jane's basically had some type of drug in her system for what feels like a month now. I hate giving her anything. I only give her drugs when absolutely necessary (fever, rash, 2 hours straight of crying, etc.) and only during the night as, during the day, the distractions seem to keep other things at bay. But that worries me too - all the drugs. AHHHHH!

Hope you're having a better week!

Time Flies

Got caught up looking at what seem like "old" pictures tonight... Reminiscing about an amazing year.

June 2009... this must be where "slept like a baby" comes from because that's basically all she did at this point. Sleep, eat, sleep, eat, poop, eat, sleep.... 8lbs, 8oz, 21 inches long

 July 2009... first glimpses of that beautiful smile!

August 2009... am absolutely shocked at how much she's changed since these earlier days - look at the short, dark hair, and the light eyebrows! 12 lbs and 24 inches long.

September 2009... ahh, we discovered the Jolly Jumper and Jane was in love! A little personality started to emerge...

October 2009... love how you can see how "short" she is in that picture with me vs. how "tall" she is now - insane how quickly they grow! Halloween will be even more exciting this year! 15 lbs and 26 inches.

November 2009... Jane gets her first "taste" of the cold Canadian winter. Started sitting up mid-November which was a fun milestone to have under our belts... a little freedom for Mommy!

December 2009... Christmas is always special but even more so when it's your first! Check out how light her hair is getting! She's really starting to look less "baby-ish" in these pics.

January 2010 - Looking all grown up here - seems like a huge change between 6 and 7 months!

February 2010... There's my little monkey! She hasn't changed a whole lot since these pictures at 8 months... just about three times as much hair. She started crawling in February... life took on a whole 'nother dimension.

March 2010... Look her hair in the picture above in the green sweater and then a month later. It's a least an inch longer, right?

April 2010... another side of Jane came out - the curious, "troublemaker" side (obviously from Dan's side of the family :p). 19 lbs and 32 inches tall.

May 2010... weather warming up. Almost a year old now and looking so "mature". Had our first swim in the outdoor pool. Her hair has lightened so much since the first few months.

June 2010... Birthday time! A year went by in a flash. Sometimes I just stare at her and can't believe the I have a one year old "baby"!! 21 lbs and 32 inches tall - gained 13 lbs and almost a foot in height in a year. Her hair went from dark brown to light blond. Her eyes are still as blue as the sky so I'm not sure when/if that may change. She's definitely a Momma's girl and apparently has the same shyness I used to have - tucking into my neck and smiling cautiously when she meets new people. She purposely does things she knows she's not supposed - looking at me and smiling before she does it and laughing when I say "no". She's walking a lot more now. Still relying mostly on crawling for getting to and from but slowly starting to walk here and there. She has 11-12 teeth, with three molars and possibly more as dare I stick my finger in and get a bite! :p She eats everything - the girls at daycare can't figure out "where she puts it all" cause she's so tiny. Her favourite song is "The Wheels on the Bus" and she throws her arms up in the air and then drops them when I sing "the babies on the bus go up and down". Her favourite book is "Brown Bear, Brown Bear, What Do You See?" - she picks it up and runs at me smiling and says "Baaaaaaa" when she sees the black sheep. Peek-a-boo and tickles make her laugh hysterically. She's on 100% cow's milk now (and no, I don't mean me as in I'm a cow :p) no more bf-ing which was an easy peasy transition as we did it so slowly.