Terrible Twos?

Is it at all possible that my 16 month old is going through the "terrible twos"?

There are things I will take responsibility for - like the fact that she won't go to sleep without a nummy - that's my fault, yes - but the drama, the rebellion, the defiance, where did this come from? Is it my fault?

Some days are fabulous. And, honestly, I thought Jane was getting "better" - i.e. she seems to respond to "No" more now vs. laughing at you. But some days I feel like I am disciplining (i.e. yelling at her and taking things away from her and making her screech) for hours at a time!

For instance, tonight, we were drawing on the white board together... and, of course, she started to try and draw on the entertainment unit. So, I started with the "no's" and that worked. But, then she started trying to put the marker in her mouth. By the third time, I took the marker away from her. She cried bloody murder. And, it's things, on and off, like this for hours on end! Another example - again, tonight - we were reading books and we had already read this book five times, backwards and frontwards and upside down, so I put that book down to grab another one. Well, didn't I basically get whacked in the face with the book as Miss Drama screamed at me, pushing the book in my face, demanding we read that book again. So, I said a firm "no", lifted her off me, and walked away. To me, this seems like the common sense approach to not spoiling her - she misbehaves and I do not give her what she wants, letting her know that the way she has behaved will not have good consequences, non? HELP!!

What the heck do I do? I hate that some days the few hours I get to spend with her in the evenings are bouts of screeching because she acts defiantly and I won't give her her way in between periods of fun. Seriously, what the heck do I do? Or am I doing the right things?

Am I doing something wrong? Sometimes I feel like I'm the worst Mom ever! I worry that I'm so worried about "spoiling her" that I'm over-disciplining her... as much as I don't want a spoiled brat, I hate that she's crying all the time - well, not all the time, but you know what I mean - tonight we had two-three breakdowns! Am I responding to the breakdowns properly? Honestly, I have no idea how to respond to them! I usually just try to distract her away from what's making her screech and that works. But should I just ignore her? Obviously I shouldn't comfort her, right? I don't know! AHHHHH!! This is serious rocket science. Being a parent is HARD, HARD, HARD. Having to worry about all the consequences of your actions - knowing that they will affect the little person you are helping develop is STRESSFUL!

I'm reading a book right now. It's been awhile since I resorted to reading a book by the "experts" but this book is from the same series I relied on during pregnancy, babyhood and now the toddler period - The Mother of All... series. And, it says all the things I am describing above (about the drama, defiance, independance, etc.) are "normal". Yeah, well they sure don't feel normal when I'm getting notes from daycare saying my daughter needs to work on her "listening ears". The over-protective Mom in me wants to rationalize it and say that Jane is just advanced and going through the terrible twos early. But, I'm really just worried that Dan and I aren't being effective in disciplining Jane or that we're not responding properly when she throws these tantrums. I haven't gotten far enough into the book to read what you should and should not do or suggested strategies for discipline. Maybe I'm doing the right things? AHHH! Maybe I should read further.

Any suggestions? Has anyone been through this or am I all on my own here?

Smart Shopping Ladies

I"ve written about this before... and saved TONS - insane amounts of money by buying Jane's clothes for the next year at the end of this years season - does that makes sense? In other words, I buy summer clothes for next year at the end of summer this year.

It's not rocket science. I usually just guess sizing and, so far, it's worked out perfectly - for example, right now Jane is wearing either 18-24mth or size 2 pants because she's tall. But, otherwise, they are quite big on her cause she's also slim. So, I'm buying size 3 bottoms for her. They may be a little big, but, chances are, they'll be perfecto!

Here's what you need to know NOW - Old Navy is giving an additional 50% off their clearance items right now!!! Get out there now ladies! The key - don't just look in your kids size area because items are all mixed in together so it's worth searching a few racks to find some goodies. FYI, there was little to no boys stuff where I'm at, so may not be worth it if you're blessed with a little man (sorry).
Here's what I got:
5 Pairs of shorts
10 Pairs of capris/leggings
10 T-shirts/Tank tops
3 Dresses
So, 28 items and basically Jane's entire summer wardrobe next year.

And here's the even better news - I paid $89 in total, including tax. Which means that I paid less than $3 per item pre-tax! In truth, certain items were only 98 cents but I averaged it all up to make it easy!!!
Wanna know how much I saved?  $416. That's how much it would have cost for all my items at regular price. I love sales. Sales make me so happy. I love to save money. Now, my hubby would say - "why are you wasting money on summer clothes right now" - but men aren't forward thinkers, they are now thinkers. Dan thinks
do we really need to spend $100 now on clothes for next year. He doesn't think, spending $100 now will save us over $400 next year. Thank God for me! :p ha ha ha. I can rationalize murder.

Get your behind down to Old Navy quick and do some smart shopping! Although I sound like an Old Navy advertisement, I am obviously not paid by Old Navy for marketing. However, if Old Navy would like to pay me, I am 4000% open to that :p ha ha ha.

Here's the monkey in something that wasn't on sale but was so cute I'm going to share anyways!

Book-Free Room

Judge all you want but I created a "book-free" playroom in my basement. We, of course, we spend most of our time in the playroom upstairs which is packed full of books. But, sometimes, we just need a break.

So, last week - on Sunday - I wanted to watch football. I know, worst Mom in the world right? So, I brought some toys downstairs - including bringing the outdoor slide inside for the winter (I'm a genius, yes). Voila! I set up a chair and ottoman for myself and it was awesome. You know when you bring your kid to someone else's house who has kids and they are occupied for hours because of the new environment and new toys. This is what my basement is like now.

Jane loves to read, which, of course, I love. I love reading to her. And I love it when she comes to me, snuggles on my chest and brings a books with her - every two-three minutes. But, every now and then, I need to go to a place where she can play by herself - which I'm told is good for development and makes me feel less guilty - and I can relax, write on the blog, check facebook, or 30 mins of football, uninterrupted! :p So, we have a book-free zone. Really not so much "book-free" but if you want the PC term - an "independent play area". Whateves - I'm a good enough Mom to not feel guilty calling it what it is - a break room. She loves it and so do I. Highly recommended if you have the space.

The New Look

Thought with my sort of hiatus combined with my sort of "come back", that it was time for a new look. Plus, I'm feeling like we're all a little more grown up now and, so, the blog's design should follow. Mostly, I was probably just bored after Jane went to bed last night and took it out on the blog.

Regardless, you're in the right place.

The Guessing Game

There's nothing worse than when your babe is sick. And worse, when you know their not only sick but also in pain. You've given them the tylenol or the advil and, yet, you're still rocking, and shhhh-ing a crying, upset baby. Or, like me, giving up on the idea of a good night's sleep and settling into the guest room with Jane sleeping on my chest while I lie, uncomfortable and hot as h-e-double hockey sticks (that's h-e-l-l for those of you suffering from major MB)... but she sleeps and, eventually, sweaty and aching, I pass out as well.

No idea what was going on last night. As I said last week, Jane's just getting over hand, foot and mouth disease which was awesome fun. But after two nights of, literally, no sleep - and I mean no sleep, I don't mean that whole "she was up all night" like we used to say when they were young and woke up every 2-3 hours, she was literally awake all night, up every 10-15 minutes. ROCKIN. She started sleeping, no more fever, little rash disappearing, etc. Then, yesterday. Touch her skin. Fever. Come about 8-9 month, thermometers are no longer needed, you feel their skin, their burning hands, and you know - fever. Wicked. So begins the guessing game.

Even the doctors play this game. Last week when I brought Jane to the docs, as usual, I got the "virus" talk...  mysterious rash, fever, boogers = virus apparently. "Just a respiratory virus Jen, continue with saline spray, advil/tylenol as needed, humidifier, etc.". Everytime I go there, it's some mysterious virus that has no treatment except saline spray, humidifier and several nights without sleep... so basically no treatment. It was MY FABULOUS DAYCARE GIRLS who accurately diagnosed Jane with hand, foot and mouth... they've seen it all.

But usually, I play the guessing game alone... to avoid the "virus talk" from my doc. Is it just me or do you also feel judged every time you bring your little one to the doc. If it's something serious, I feel judged because I let it go two days without coming in for an appt. AND WORSE, if I DARE go to a walk-in clinic because my doc was booked up for too long for me to leave it un-assessed. If it's a "virus", I feel judged because I brought her in AGAIN for something that has no treatment and is "obviously" a virus! :p *My doc is great, I'm not critisizing him, I think most of it is things I make up in my head because I'm a woman and I over analyze things*

So, yesterday, I played the guessing game, and - as usual - my go-to culprit was teething. Teething sucks. Jane's "fangs" are coming in. I couldn't remember that they were called canines and called them fangs and my bro-in-law told me I was too into the vampires crap! :p ha ha ha. I guess in the long run, it's great that Jane's teeth seem to come in in twos. But combining fever and pain = crappy sleep and that stinks for everybody. AND, it always seems that Jane's teething is always in line with her being sick. I'm curious if teething lowers you immune system protection? I don't know how - maybe because your body is working to bring the teeth in so doesn't have the energy to fight bugs? That's my theory and I know it's wrong and I don't care. :p

The guessing game stinks - because it can work out well - like in the case where you guess it's "just a virus", avoid the judgmental doctors trip, and proceed with the useless "treatments" - or it can work out crappily (made that word up) and you can end up in a state of guilt because you let your babe go on two or three days with laryngitis without constant pain reliever... like I did in June. :p

Here's my question for you - what the heck do you dress your babe in when he/she has a fever for bed? My doc said, after two nights of me doing the opposite, that you should leave them in whatever they usually sleep in. My thought was, with burning skin and a high fever, wouldn't they be hot? I can't remember how I feel when I have a fever...??? 

Craziness Update

Thought about "you" (by you, I mean you guys - my other Mommas) today when I did something totally stupid and wanted to share... twice today I did stupid mommy brain things that made me feel so cool! :p One - I pulled into a parking spot. Got my change out to put in the meter. Walked up to the meter... for the spot that was next to the spot my car was parked in. Awesome. Two - Pulled into a different parking spot. Put money in the meter. There was already 108 minutes on the meter to begin with and I added money. Awesome.

In all fairness, it's because I'm exhausted. Jane's got hand, foot and mouth disease. Another awesome. It's a virus with fever, rash, sore throat, sores on hands, feet and mouth, and a bazillion other things that have resulted in (1) my child screeching randomly throughout the day (2) no sleep, literally, for either of us - no naps, no sleep, nothing - for two days and (3) a cold for momma. So, like I said, in my defense, I'm running on empty. Thankfully I am able to put on a good front for work and only pull out the MB moments when I'm outside of offices - as far as I know :p

Other updates - a few weeks back, I wanted to ask you about what the heck you do with a child who thinks "no" is funny and is a game? However, the last week or so, Jane seems to have come around, a little (knocking on wood), with the whole discipline situation... a little. She still tests us - purposely doing something she knows will result in a "no" to see if it works. I think she thinks it's a game. Like she'll climb up on the couch, stand up (oh me nerves) and jump (Dear Lord help me) and when I come stomping in to grab her, saying "Jane, NO!" she starts cracking up. When I take her in the other room to "no and distract" as my mom says, she immediately runs back to the couch and starts climbing up. So, people say "why don't you try not responding to her"... and I have tried that. However, when your 15 month old is standing on the edge of the couch, bouncing, not responding might not be the best action, disciplinary or not. :p "Yes, Doctor, just like I said, she broke her arm because I was trying to teach her 'no' by letting her do the wrong thing and not responding"... hello, child services.

Ok, well, perhaps just because I said I wasn't going to write anymore that lately I've started to feel the desire to write again... ha ha ha, a woman always wants what she can't have.

I may be around a little... who knows! :p No commitment though! tee hee hee

Here's a few update pics of my little monkey:

So cute, So true...

There are a few I can really relate to... Thanks Lindsay.