Aug 4, 2009

You CAN Handle the Truth #5

You will fight with your hubby and you will nag him... I don't know if it's the tiredness, the slight bitterness that your life has changed so much and his hasn't been as affected, the frustration that occurs when you do things differently, or, more than likely, a combination of everything!

It was a priority for Dan and I not to fight and not to nag or criticize each other for doing things differently... but, fact is, once baby comes, everything changes. The first six weeks are hard. You're both tired, you're scared, you're nervous, you're worried, you're adjusting, and you're just trying to do your best.

I think the key for us has been talking about it - explaining why we're nagging, why we're angry, etc. We usually do this after a "break time" so we each have time to cool down and realize where we were wrong cause our fights are usually the result of both of us doing something stupid... one person starting stupid and the other reacting stupidly! ha ha ha.


Samantha said...

I figured as much...I find that now, before the baby has even arrived I'm more "nagging" and get irritated at him more easily..I'll blame the hormones (for now;)

MommyBrain said...

So true, so true. The only way to get through is to keep communicating and make time for each other - even 5 minutes a day - just to hold each other or look at each other.

From experience, I would say, "This too shall pass." There is light at the end of the tunnel ... and there are other obstacles to overcome. Together.

Jessica said...

Ah, yes. Very true. I agree completely - the number one thing that got my husband and me through those first few weeks was COMMUNICATION. So often, it helped us both to just talk about what we were feeling and to discover that the other was feeling it, too. It's easy to lose perspective in those sleepless weeks, and to have a little pity party believing that you're the only one feeling whatever it is, but there's a lot of healing in finding out that you're not alone after all.

Terrific blog, and congratulations on your beautiful little girl!